Saturday, January 10, 2015

I Am Always More Spiritual in the Mornings . . .

. . . and then the "worries of the world" take over (Mark 4:19). After that glorious post yesterday morning of Kingdom Focus (Matthew 6:33), I was faced with some stressful points of my day! Suzanne emailed me about getting together with Kellie and Jamie in Phoenix, Nathan said the worship leader for next week's conference was not able to do it, people asking to get together with me last minute and coming over at 11:45. That means two meetings back to back (ended up being five hours of meeting time).  Oh my, I have to get all this stuff done for next weekend before they come. Oh, Suzanne, you have been sending emails, and they have not arrived? Oh yes, my husband has never installed the software for the remote desktop to access that particular email account. I wonder how many letters have gone there that we have not responded to.  

 Then the uncertainty of working with "P" personality types made me wonder: What will we do for a rental car next weekend? Where are we going to sleep? Did Chris mean he would pick us up at the airport when he said, "Have van will travel?"  

Oh yes, and in the back of my mind is: "I might have cancer!"  I need my husband home. I write him a text, and we have a tearful exchange before my 11:45 am comes popping in the door. I am tearful with her when I realize that when she said, "I'll bring lunch" she meant "I'll bring my lunch."  So, I go to divide what she has brought, and she looks at me quizzically, "Well, I guess you can have half of my banana."  Oh, she didn't say she would bring lunch for both of us.  Shoot. I thought that is what she meant. Feel stupid. Feel frazzled. I cry.

It was good. She needs to see me the "mentor" in a more vulnerable state. She needed to understand that this whole "spots" thing could be really serious. It may not be, but it will be a while before I know. So, it is a waiting game.

Oh yes, "seek first His Kingdom."  Seek Jesus first (because He is the face of the Kingdom). Good time of talking and good for those I mentor to see me vulnerable.

Encouraged by Renee's email. Yes, she is being impacted by our little Kingdom Band. She writes it in her letter to all of her friends. (Lord, help me not to forgot about getting together with Katherine. She is always so strong, but I do not want to overlook her because I was always overlooked because of my strength!)


Delegation made to George. He will talk to the worship leader (I think we are going with iPad worship next weekend). He will talk to Chris about picking us up. Suzanne is willing to be super flexible about meeting with Jamie and Kellie, but it looks like Sunday night is a possibility. I am the middle person about the schedule. Good she went straight to the source since she works in the same office, and I do not.

Listen to an NPR thing about melanoma diagnosis between Jamie and Kellie. Feeling better about it. Wish I had taken a picture of the spot before she took it out with the biopsy. 

George calls to say he is coming home early. He will stay home more instead of living with his mom. I am independent, but I need him. He brings me a salmon salad with hazelnuts, and we all eat Burgerville together and talk. Family is the best. News together and bed. Sleep like a baby where I could not fall asleep the night before because I felt all alone and missed my husband on the weeknights. There is always a withdrawal after his long vacations. Cancer scare exacerbates that. (Isn't that word exacerbates a great word?) 

Seeking Jesus again this morning. But then again, I am always more spiritual in the mornings. :) Worries of the world be gone all day today. 

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