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Trying to Get to the Bottom of this Need to Belong

I love so much about this Institute I am in. I love the readings we have been doing. I love the academic question every month. This last one, about living in the Kingdom of God was really, really fun for me to write (even though it took all day). I loved the interaction that I had with those who did respond to my posted question, and I especially loved the response from the grader for this portion of the institute. But the community in general didn't really respond to what I said, they all had a great time with each other talking, but other than two people, my answer was just ignored. The same was true for my practice answer. We were supposed to write about a phrase from Psalm 23 that really hit us, and only one person responded. (And that person is someone I really liked from the Institute.) 

Why does it matter to me?
I have such wonderful community here, and I can talk about these things with them. In fact, I met with one of those small groups on Friday, and we prayed through Psal…

My Belovedness Charter

My princess, I have given you the names Carol and Boldly Beloved for a reason. You are a wonderful creation of Mine, and I am with you always as your victorious, quietly loving, warrior, empowering you to be bold and rejoicing over you with songs and shouts of joy (and your earthy father was listening to Me when he changed your name to Carol without even knowing it meant "Song of Joy"). On top of all this, I want you to know there is no condemnation from Me because you are in Christ Jesus, you are free from the critique of men, living only to please and delight Me as your audience of One. Nothing, absolutely nothing, will separate you from My love in Christ Jesus.

Saturday Sixteen Minute Freewrite

7:00 am, and GO!

Here is go with 16 minutes of furiously typing on the keyboard. :) 
Bummer about my toe after 30 days of walking around the campus and praying God's Kingdom come there, that I would break my toe. I must realize that GOD IS GOOD and SOVEREIGN, and there is a reason I am not to walk 21 miles this morning.

So, I am brining my bike, and I am probably going to bike three laps to their one lap around. This is a big undertaking, and I heard God say to do 21 miles, but it will be on wheels rather than on my feet!
So, here are the other things that I am thinking of this morning. Regarding the whole thing about the Residency. I do not need to feel GUILTY that I have done most of these things. I do not need to feel GUILTY that I don't have anymore false narrative floating around after 35 years of seeking God's true narratives (I think the main false narrative is that in order to fit in with the other participants, I have to act like all this stuff is new to me, and it is…

58. If We Make It Home by Nelson

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This book uses an alternating first person point of view narrative for three college friends reunited after twenty-five years apart. I didn't really identify with any of the three main character, but eventually, I found myself interested in their stories and where they would all end up in the end.

I think this is a very good first novel for this new author! I loved the Oregon setting for the adventure that these women are taken on. There were a couple of things that I thought were a bit far-fetched, and I would have liked a little more development of the "why" behind what happened in order to make it seem a bit more plausible. But all that aside, I enjoyed the book and was glad I read it!

*I received a complimentary copy of this book from Kregel Publications and was under no obligation to post a review, positive or negative.*

57. Bella Poldark by Winston Graham

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Did I really not review this book! It is the final in the beautiful series of 12 books. I will so miss these characters! It is worth the 6064 pages of reading. Winston Graham does a lovely job of wrapping up all the stories for each main character. Really enjoyed the whole series.


Friday Freewrite Fifteen

Trusting God is a totally safe place to be. I am just processing on this keyboard without stopping for fifteen minutes. I am reclining with my toe elevated because I broke it. Silly me. It found the post that holds up my kitchen island. I am almost humored by it. It is not incredibly painful (at least not until about 11:30 pm last night when I had to take the "buddy tape" off because I think it was swelling beyond it). I just hope I can still prayer walk on Saturday.

This week was "Synthesis Week" for the Renovaré Institute that I attended last week in Santa Barbara. I feel sort of like I cheated. Because we have had "Kingdom Communities" in place since 2009, we know what it is like to live in the reality of a "community of prayerful love" full of Kingdom Seekers. I am so grateful for the community that we have here in Corvallis. So, I was sort of lonely at the Institute. Like I was an outsider looking in at people coming to the realization that …

Falling In Love

Nothing is more practical than
finding God, than
falling in Love ...
in a quite absolute, final way.
What you are in love with,
what seizes your imagination, will affect everything.
It will decide
what will get you out of bed in the morning,
what you do with your evenings,
how you spend your weekends,
what you read, whom you know,
what breaks your heart,
and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.
Fall in Love, stay in love,
and it will decide everything.
Fr. Pedro Arrupe, SJ (1907-1991)

56. The Lord and His Prayer by N.T. Wright

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This is a wonderful little book that expands upon the Lord's Prayer in such a beautiful way. I have heard N.T. Wright speak, but I had only read excerpts of his writing, and this is a nice introduction. 

It takes each phrase and really gives it such a "kingdom-minded" treatment. Well-worth reading.

Prayer Review of Tuesday-Thursday

What made me feel most alive and in tune with God's plan:

Teaching Pilates to eager 20-somethingsWorking in a positive university environment with lovely coworkersRenovaré Institute readings The LORD's Prayer meditationUpdating my syllabi and making them be up to the PAC Template (submitting to my authority was hard at first but yielded peaceful fruit in the end)Praying around the Campus with John and GeorgePraying with Katherine through neighborhoods and have Kent run into us and say, "Oh, are you prayer walking?"Walking in the rain through my "Entering Gates" of the East Campus of OSU singing my song and loving the fall in CorvallisPoldark - Bella Poldark is the last novel out of 12. LOVE THIS SERIES! Why did you have to die Winston Graham?Alexa Worship Music - I really like this feature! I never thought I would enjoy this new device like I have.Discussing life with young moms in my living room Knowing speaking to groups is a "sweet spot" for my …

Prayerful Review of Monday

I have not done a prayerful review in quite some time. Maybe months. So, I am going to try to do them during this busy time. 

What made me feel most alive and in tune with God's plan:



Getting my teeth cleaned. Resting in the chair. Taking care of myself. Not overeatingPrayer walking with KatherineReading PoldarkDrinking Chai in the morningMeditating on the Lord's Prayer after a negative encounterWalking - just the simple experience of putting one foot in front of the othersListening to My Music on Alexa: Classical, CelticHaving down time between 12:45-4:45Walking to my OSU meeting and hearing the diversity gatheringThe aliveness and hope of the OSU campusWatching people dance and seeing they have skill for the first time


What made me feel most dead and not in tune with God's plan: Guarded, annoyed reaction from a person Saying, "No" to another person (story of my life) Finding the volunteer schedule for Friday is different from how I was first told Still a bit of pa…