All Creatures of Our God and King

All creatures of our God and King,
lift up your voice and with us sing,

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Thou burning sun with golden beam,
Thou silver moon with softer gleam!

O praise Him! O praise Him!

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Ye who long pain and sorrow bare
Praise God and on Him cast your care

O praise Him! O praise Him!

Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Rushing wind that art so strong
Clouds that sail in heaven alone
Rising mourn in praise rejoice
Lights of evening find a voice
All ye men of tender heart
Forgive others, take your part
Praise the Father, praise the Son
Praise the Spirit, three in One (2x)

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

It is Well With My Soul

When peace like a river attendeth my way
When sorrows like sea billows roll
What ever my lot you have taught me to say
It is well, it is well with my soul

Though the devil will ruin, though trials may come
Let this blessed assurance control
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate
And He shed His own blood for my soul

It is well, with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul

My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought
My sin not in part but the whole
Is nailed to the cross and I bear it no more
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, oh my soul

It is well, with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul

And Lord haste the day when my faith shall be sight
And the clouds be rolled back as a scroll
The trump shall resound and the Lord shall descend
Even so, it is well with my soul

It is well with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul

Yes, peace like a river, Lord. Really, all around me is difficult. If you were to count it all out on a table, the stakes are such that I should be a basket case by now:

My mom's chest pains and heart disease and slide toward heaven
My aunt's death
Cousin's 23 year marriage ending when she gets aunt's inheritance settled
Cousin hooked on Speed and tearing aunt's house apart
Bruce's melanoma and seeing that whole family go through so much
The drama between two people that I got caught in the middle of last week
Friend's child custody battle - those poor kids
Finding out these long-time friends are on the verge of divorce
Lorraine's fall, broken hip, hospital stay
A friend's heartbreaking news on Thursday
The drama about whether I should come to the conference or not. Oh brother!

BUT it is well with my soul! I am in such a supportive environment with praycry (thanks ladies! You have no idea how much you bless me everyday by your love for the Lord and for others), friends, church (HUGE - I have never had church leadership be supportive, ever! Such rocks, absolute rocks of mature, godly people, blessings to Claudia, Vicki, Kim, Nancy, Rick, Steve, Jerome, Big Carol - they are supportive just because of their stability as human beings. So sad that I have never known that before in my life!), Ginny and Lorraine, Debbie, Patty, on-line friends), Kim I. is also a HUGE rock of prayer support for me too.

Also, the thing with Bruce has caused me to see your power, drawn me closer in relationship with a plethora of people, including Bruce and Mary Beth! (Reconnecting after many years of just running in different circles and having different ministries. Old friends draw together in crisis). I have had sweet loving talks with my brother over mom's care, huge blessings all the way around in all of the sorrow, really.

Above all, YOU Lord are my ROCK. I am so glad that you have put me so FOCUSED in your Word and prayer. Everything seems so very applicable that I am studying with Bird's Eye View/Quiet Times/Romans study/Peacemaker Sunday School) and praying with Nancy and Kim and Kim I! It is so amazing how You fit all my life together. So OBVIOUS that we made such a good choice this last year.

So, peace. That is what I feel.

Wellness Check

For me, I need balance, and it is time to get it

Well-Watered Soul - time for Bible reading and prayer. Want to FINISH Romans 3:21-31 (I kept getting interrupted yesterday). Tomorrow, I would like to have a day of prayer or at least a half day. So much to process.

Well-Educated Mind - Read book club selection or Sherlock Holmes

Well-Nourished Heart - I think I will call my mom and see how she is doing. I don't know how much longer she will be on this earth. Pray for L - she is so hurting.

Wellness in Strength - Went to Group Power and Elliptical. I need two hours tomorrow of cardio, but I have a free day. Maybe a run or hike with George.

A Clean Date

I know this may be hard to believe, but I do not have one bit of chicken scratch on this date in my calendar. I am free as a bird. So, I wrote FREE. I had George take the car to work (He was going to walk because his bike is on the fritz, but it is pouring down rain, for crying out loud!) so that I am not even tempted to go out, and so that I can say no to anyone that asks me to go out. :) I am looking forward to a day to decompress after a very high-powered week living my girlfriend Mary Beth's life, having six children, racing from appointment to appointment, and dealing with one of her friends who is difficult. In addition, I lived my life of homeschool mom, fitness buff, small group and Bible study leader, counselor to friends.

I am dizzy from living two lives, but I am so happy and fulfilled too. I know that there are some deep waters ahead for those around me that I love so passionately, but I also know that there is a very deep God, whom I love even more passionately, and He will carry me one step at a time.

Calling Me to Walk On Water

Literally, got a major bombshell dropped on me today. I am called to walk with some people through some very difficult days, and this isn't even Bruce and Mary Beth.

So, if you read this, please pray for me. This is huge, but the events of the last week have shown His infinite power to do the impossible.

Breathe

Yes, I have a breathe. Taking care of two families is quite a chore. Going from two to six kids is alot!

Also breathing and happy that I was able to get over a little "bump" with a situation. It was awkward, but I feel like I handled it well. :) YEAH GOD.

He led me to peace through prayer and this passage that I memorized almost thirty years ago:

Psalm 31: 19 - end
How great is Your goodness,
Which You have stored up for those who fear You,
Which You have wrought for those who take refuge in You,
Before the sons of men!
You hide them in the secret place of Your presence from the conspiracies of man;
You keep them secretly in a shelter from the strife of tongues.
Blessed be the LORD,
For He has made marvelous His lovingkindness to me in a besieged city.
As for me, I said in my alarm,
"I am cut off from before Your eyes";
Nevertheless You heard the voice of my supplications
When I cried to You.
O love the LORD, all you His godly ones!
The LORD preserves the faithful
And fully recompenses the proud doer.
Be strong and let your heart take courage,
All you who hope in the LORD.

Grateful - A freewrite

I am sitting here in my happy spot. George has gone to take the kids to church and then on to go to do the shopping for the week.

Grateful - that George sees my need for a little quiet. He is a dear one.

I now have about 1 1/2 hours until I get ready for church that starts at 11:00 a.m.

Grateful - for some time to sit and reflect and journal (here) and pray

Sunday school will be our 9th lesson on Peacemaking for the excellent Ken Sande DVD series.

Grateful - that I go to a church that places a premium value on peacemaking by teaching its members how to make peace in a Godly way. This was one of our top ten things we were looking for in a church.

After that, I will have a long distance conversation with Katrina about "time."

Grateful - for wonderful online friends who love God!

I will also go and study the gospel of Mark with Norieh

Grateful -that God has heard my cries for this neighborhood and has brought Nourieh in my life to study Scripture.

Well, I am off to have a long prayer time before I "beautify" for church.

Grateful - for the gift of prayer and life in YOU Lord.

On the Road Again

Jogging Up, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

I just love this photo. I would have put it on my Project 365, but I also loved the picture of my dh and I too. I just thought this was symbolic of where I am right now. I am pressing forward.

I have written an allegory off and on for years in my journal much like Hinds Feet On High Places, but the girl is running forward listening to the "Great Coach" and following Him. I am climbing and reaching toward the goal.

I like this.

Life is Too Short to Be Scared

Just wanted to say that I am not scared. I appreciate your comments, and I know that He holds me in the palm of his hand, forever.

I am so convinced that I am in a very good partnership - team actually. There will be four of us who will be working together in seeing discipleship at our wonderful church. I have known one on the team for 28 years because I used to play basketball with her in college! (I was her back up. She went on to be an Olympic Gold Medalist). So, I know that I am in such a healthy environment. ALL the lies that were whispered to me are being washed away and replaced with three other very truthful and Godly women. So, I am grateful.

I am also realizing that life is short. The brevity of life is coming in full view as I see that our friend with melanoma has a very poor prognosis. Sending them to New York was a big stretching of our faith (The ringleaders of Lisa, Michelle, and I). After we got the go ahead at noon yesterday, Lisa said she wanted to back-peddle, and God said, "NO!" If any of us had back-peddled, we wouldn't have been able to see His glory manifested in providing miracle after miracle on this road to getting them to New York. We wouldn't have known the love of countless phone calls with DEAR people and the generosity of people giving from as far away as Pennsylvania and North Carolina. (You know who you are. :))We would have missed out on the joy of living by faith.

So, I say: (S)HE WHO HESITATES IS LOST

There is no room to be scared because life is too short. Embrace the moments. Don't shrink back.

This is what I am pondering this Friday.

I'm so happy that I am done

That taking a picture was a pain in the neck! I am five pounds down.

So much has happend in the last week. I am so looking forward to all God has for me in the future.

I am scared too.

Carol

Saturday Food

Saturday Food, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

Not a bad day.

Friday Fast and Fast Breaking Dinner

Friday Fast and Fast Breaking Dinner, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

I fasted with only water, diet soda, and tea until dinner time.

Good Morning!

Got up at 5:15 a.m. and went to Group Power and an hour of cardio.

I am fasting the rest of the day for Lent Friday! So, I don't have to keep track of my eating by pictures! YEAH! (What a hassle. Makes me want to eat less!)

I will spend the rest of the day reading Pride and Prejudice!

Thursday Food

Thursday Food, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

Didn't eat most of the day. I was out and about until 5 p.m., and I only got a string cheese and a tea before I left!

Wednesday Food

Wednesday Food, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

I snacked on a lot more junk today. Busy days make for more hand to mouth.

Tuesday Food

My creation, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

Good day!

It may sound funny but . . .

Photographing my food and posting it here is keeping me from eating as much!

Why?

1) I have to go to the trouble of taking a picture and posting it. So, I am not sneaking little snacks here and there because it costs me time and hassle to put it out there.

2) Others see it, and that always makes me accountable. :) It is sort of like the food loop that we used to have where we all posted what we ate ever day. This is just a visual of that concept.

3) Research has shown that people who eat consistently the same thing for breakfast and lunch tend to have less weight problems because they know what they are getting into. I am trying to do that for at least two meals a day, and I let my third meal be the variety. I can just use the same picture again when I do this. So, it keeps me consistent knowing what I am eating.

Doing really well with this new fun week. I will only do it a week though. Too much time, but it is getting me back in the GROOVE of eating right after a "emotional munchout" last week because of the surgery.

By the Way, he went walking with his kids today, and his wife says you would never know he just had brian surgery. YIPPEE!

40 Minute Power Walk to Irish Bend Bridge

Power Walk, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

One Hour of Group Power

Group Power Weights, originally uploaded by carolfoasia

Monday Food

Monday Food, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

Sunday Food

Sunday Food, originally uploaded by carolfoasia.

Food Photo History Sunday to Sunday

I got this great idea as I was waking up this morning!

I will take a picture of everything that goes into my mouth for a week! This might be a big project or it might just make me not eat as much because of the hassle of having to take a picture of it for all the world to see!

I will also take a picture to symbolize my workouts. I might not take the camera to the club (too heavy and conspicuous), but I will take a pic to symbolize or maybe even use an old picture from one of my Dale Carnegie workout photos!

Today is a 1/2 day of prayer. I have so much on my heart that I need that time. It is my application from Bible study and reading this week to do this. I will take the kids to Sunday School and drop George off at Church and have some time of quiet and then I will go and pick everybody up again. I know it will be an interrupted 1/2 day, but such is the disadvantage of having only one car!

A Brighter Day

We have had pouring down rain for the last two days, but just like the song says, "the sun will come out tomorrow!" I still have my periods of weepyness, but I am as peace.

Decided in the shower today that I would JUST concentrate on the FE (Food and exercise) for the rest of the days on this little discipline regime. I am down four pounds. That puts me only 1 pound over my ideal weight! YEAH!

The tricky news is that I am going to be a wearing a close fitting bridesmaid dress in June that is taffetta. Therefore, it is going to show every bump! So, I would like to get below even my ideal weight!

So

FOOD: So far Friday has been good. I have had:
Slim-Fast Bar (just because I have been so busy with all the emails and calls regarding Bruce and his surgery)
Oregon Chai tea with Low Fat whipped cream

EXERCISE: Already accomplished for the day!
1 hour of POWER with Group Power
1 1/2 hours on the Elliptical!
WOOHOO!

I cried a bucket yesterday and even cried more today on the phone with Kim, but I am GOOD, and I am needing to pray for these lovely friends and quite typing on this blog!

Say the word and I will sing for You
Over oceans deep I will follow
If each star was a song
And every breath of wind praise
It would still fail by far to say
All my heart contains
I simply live, I simply live for You
As the glory of Your presence
Now fills this place
In worship we will see You face to face
There is nothing in this world
To which You can be compared
Glory on glory, praise upon praise
You bind the broken hearted
And save all my tears
And by Your word You set the captives free
There is nothing in this world
That You cannot do
I simply live, I simply live for You

On death and dying

Well, our friend was rushed up to Portland for brain surgery. It was moved up by 10 days because of new symptoms.

I am reading on the internet and all of the things say: Prognosis poor, most people die within two years.

It is weird to see him last Friday. On the outside, he looks strong and healthy. I am so sad. I am so very, very sad. I am sad for the kids that I have known since they all came out of the womb. I am sad for his wife who has been a friend for many years. It is weird that it is bringing up lots of memories of our friendship that have been painful too. It is funny how these sorts of things bring up so much in your heart and mind.

I want to help, but I don't know how to do that. I know that others are going up to see them in Portland, but I really don't want to be in the way. I know she has said that I wouldn't be in the way, but because of our history, I would feel in the way. I wonder how to get over that.

It was so nice because her mother said that the kids love us and don't stop talking about us when they are at home. I know that my role is to help with the kids more than anything right now. I love these kids like my own. I really and truly do.

That is my reflection at 11 p.m. on Valentine's Day. Sounds so morbid. I am so sad.

I think I am back on track

Today is a new day! I have started off well in my eating, getting dinner ready, keeping things tidy, and getting the kids on track with school.

Yesterday, I did all the heaviest weights in Group Power, going to the 9:20 class for the first time. I will try to go on Thursday if I can get the boys up and going on their schoolwork too.

I feel settled about Monday night's revelation and have determined to take a sabbatical from Thursday at 2 p.m. until Wednesday at 7:00 p.m. I want to have some extended time in worship on Saturday afternoon and Sunday morning. Need to really listen!

Later today

Well, I am just doing hunky dorry. I am really thankful for people who pray for me! I asked some prayer people to pray, and I am covered and lifted and feel really good this evening about last night's meeting. I think there were some positive things that came out of it. So, I am leaving it there.

The melanoma is not good. Brain surgery is on February 26th. I hate this disease!

A Little Discouraged

I went to a ministry meeting last night, and I just sat there in stunned silence. I didn't know what to say as they talked about discipleship. I have so much to say, but I don't know how to say it. I don't think this is where I fit though.

Lord, you gave me verse after verse of encouraging words during my quiet time on Sunday and Monday. So, what gives with a pretty discouraging meeting?

The good thing is that they are lovely people, and I know that they will pray. So, nothing but good will come of that.

I was up until 2:30 a.m. processing it though. UGH!

Now, I am off to get my back shifted back by going to a Group Power class.

Let's Here it for a Free Saturday!

Yesterday, I sat and read through a big chunk of Isaiah over a period of a few hours. It was lovely to sit and soak, and the men were gone for a good part of it as they went shopping with their Christmas/Birthday gift cards and went on a hike.

Ideal setting for reading, meditating, listening, and responding to God. I love free Saturdays!

"to those who carry out plans that are not mine,
forming an alliance, but not by my Spirit . . ." 30:1

Lord, I don't want to do that. Were some of the things that happened last year plans that I carried out that weren't of You? Did I form an alliance that was not of Your Spirit. I think the answer to the second question is yes. I think the thing that we did was beautiful, but I should not have done it with her. Not with her.

"This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel says:

In returning and rest you will be saved
In quietness and confidence is your strength,
But you were not willing" 30:15

Oh LORD, I am so willing. I am returning and resting in You this February 11, and I am so at peace with myself and everyone around me. That is a good place to be.

"Therefore, the LORD longs to be gracious to you,
And therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you.
For the LORD Is a God of justice;
How blessed are all those who long for Him." 30:18

Longing for you from a small town in the Pacific Northwest. I thank yiou for your compassion and graciousness and your justice.

Oh, it is time for breakfast. Gotta go!

Back on Track

There are people praying, and I am at peace once again. So, yesterday was sort of a readjustment day, but I am back on track in my eating, at least. I will go back to Group Power and maybe go for a run tonight after I get back from Kim's house.

Drinking tea, having a high fiber and calcium breakfast and doing homeschool this morning.

I just lost Warren Wiersbe on my old computer. So, I just ordered the commentary for Romans called Be Right so I won't have to have my computer with me to read what he has to say about it.

I will read Marley and Me after study.

People are praying, and this makes me very grateful.

When discipline goes out the door

Actually, it was a fairly good day in every area. My eating was on track, and I went for a walk with Paul. Then, I talked to MBA, and the reality is that this brain tumor in B's brain is not looking good.

Pass me the chips and go get me a Blizzard. I need some comfort right now.

So, there you have it. Sometimes, food brings comfort for me, and I was looking for anything that I could. I ate chips and prayed.

That is all I have to say this morning. I skipped my workout and am going to have some time with God right now. I think this will be my "off" day. I'm only in the mood to pray this morning.

Evaluating Yesterday: An A- Day

Food - B

I did great until about 3 p.m. Then, I ate all the rest of the totilla roll-ups and had 1/2 cup apple crisp with ice cream on top. I still think it was a great day because I didn't snack before bed! So, I would give myself a B.

Today: I want to make sure I get enough veggies and stay away from the remaining apple crisp!

Academics - Read 1 hour. A+

Today: 1/2 hour

Communion - Good day of Rest in Romans

I had lots of extra time. So, I finished my Romans 2 study and had a good time of praying for the world and "stuff."

Today: Will pray through Scripture and Romans 2 as I seek the Lord's will for how He wants to take what I have learned and apply it to my life!

Exercise - A+ 1 hour Group Power, 1 hour Elliptical

Today: 1 hour walk with Paul or George?

Daily Care - A

Good homeschooling day where we got everything done. Swabbed my bathroom.

Today: Swab boys bathroom. Check on laundry level and do load if necessary.

February Fifth FACED

Ok, I am going to take from now until the Academy Awards to be really disciplined in my eating and exercise. I am only about three pounds away from my goal, but I could go down into my "range." So, I am going to go down!

FOOD

B: Fruit, fiber one, and yogurt
L: Salad with string cheese and turkey
D: Family meal in smaller portions
Snacks: One fruit, two high calciums

ACADEMICS

Read 1/2 hour a day

DAILY COMMUNION

Praying the Scriptures for Spiritual Growth/journaling
Bible Reading
1 hour of Romans
1/2 hour of If You Want to Walk on Water You Have to Get Out of the Boat

EXERCISE

Monday/Wednesday/Friday - Group Power Hour/Cardio Hour
Tues/Thurs/Sat. or Sun. - Power walk/run

DAILY CARE OF FAMILY

Swabbing out of bathrooms
Kitchen dishes dried and put away before bed
One load of laundry if needed
Thursday - Boys' sheets
Friday - Our sheets
Friday - Home bless throughout house
Keep office clear of papers

Countdown: 10

Righteousness, Relaxation, Riding the Wave

image from: www.art.com

I was going to put this in my Word Processor as an idea for a message, but I thought I would put it here! I just finished up a word study of "righteousness" for my Romans study this morning. Then, I got in the shower, and this whole thought came to me.

RIGHTEOUSNESS

We are righteous because of the imputed righteousness of Jesus Christ, imparted to us as a gift. We can't earn it, and God settles the demand for righteousness in our own life through the blood of Christ. So . . . we can

RELAX

"There remains therefore a sabbath rest for the people of God." Because I can't earn that righteousness on my own, I can relax in what Jesus Christ has done for me. I can abide in that vine. I can be at rest and there is nothing that I can do to earn his righteousness by my own acts or service, but because of the imparted righteousness through Jesus Christ, I can not only relax, but I can . . .

RIDE THE WAVE

I have the Holy Spirit of the living God inside of ME! So, that relaxing doesn't make me lazy or nonchalant, but I am aware of God in me and HE propels me toward things that don't earn righteousness, but they are the fruit of righteousness.

I am just writing down the "3 R's" for today:Righteousness, Relaxation, and Riding the Wave!

I am neglecting this blog

I have been so busy with my other daily blog that I am neglecting this blog. So, I am just writing a bit.

Communion

I am loving my study of Romans. It is nice to be just studying ONE book of the Bible now. It was hard juggling both Ephesians and Romans over the last couple of months. So, it is nice to be done. I just have Bird's Eye View, and this is just an overview study. So, it isn't deeper study stuff. So, I can handle this when it kicks back up in late February.

What a wonderful thing to see the "heavens declaring the glory of God" while I have my head up and looking around at picture opportunities, and unexpected biproduct of the Project365!

I have been finding a lovely balance of prayer and study lately, and I feel like the Lord and I are tracking. I feel so surrounded by loving fellowship right now. Kim and Nancy are real highlights even though the beginning was sort of bumpy. That "dance of discomfort" when I am in a new situation is dispelling.

It is so well with G and I, but it usually is. He is the greatest husband in the world. The kids are great these days. We have so much happiness in our life with each other. Overflowing. It is nice to have that much happiness in my church family too. Too many unhappy people at my old church, and it is nice to be with those who have trials in their life, but it is just a different feel all the way around about what God is doing in their lives. It is almost too weird how scary it is at the old place now that I am in the new. I will always be grateful for God's deliverance of me, and I know that people probably get tired of me blogging about that fact!

Academics

I am in a reading funk right now. I just don't feel like starting a new book at the moment. I have Marley and Me waiting for me at the library. So, I think I will just read that and not try anything too deep for now.

Food and Exercise

Exercise is great. I am back on track. Food has been fabulous too the last few days.

Daily Care of Family

Good. Homeschool is going really well. I think that we are on track. House is clean. Laundry is done. Life is good, and we are eating well. :)

Lazy Day

I love lazy days. I woke up and was going to go to work out, but I didn't feel well. I went back to sleep, and I will go to workout at the 6:20 p.m. class at TH. So, I slept but got up and had some good time in Romans, structuring Romans 1:18-32. I sent it to K and N after that.

Then, we got to listening to The Story of the World: The Middle Ages, Disc 2, and I love it. While we did that, I did more Core Truths and Memory Verses from Discipleship Essentials. I love those truths, and it was good to type them in today and say, I LOVE THE BASICS of the Christian life! He makes it all so very simple.

I also spent some time organizing photos, and I am pretty sure I have most of the Adobes integrated into the HP Premier, and I am not going to download into the Adobe anymore. Too confusing.

The boys did Math and we went to Rachel's for haircuts and M had a blast going through their little farmette and taking pictures of various things. I think we have a future photographer on our hands. He is very good!

I came home and updated my blog and also talked to K.I. So, now I am waiting to go to workout, but I will feed the 'chilins before I go.

Then, I will pick up Monarch of the Glen, and hopefully, G and I will be able to watch some of it tonight!

Sunny Through the End of January

Some Party!

The Birthday Boy

The Knitting Grandma/Mother in Law

The ten day trend is sunny weather. I am happy about that.

I am hoping that I find this is true for my "inner weather" too. I am feeling better today. We had MJ's party, and I decided that I would be relaxed, and it was so very enjoyable. I love my mother-in-law, and she came to join in the fun. She knit and I organized photos from Adobe to HP Premier.

Oh well, there is my dh to come to bed. I must get off this thing.

Just writing

I read most people's blogs, and they usually have such important and amazing things that they write, but mine is really quite boring! LOL! Oh well, I am just going to write.

I am still not feeling really, really well. I purposely skipped Group Power again. I even woke up time, but I had no desire to go. I want to feel better. I need some iron and some water. I feel very lathargic. Part of that probably contributed to my meltdown at Bible study yesterday. I am a bit discouraged there, but I don't know what I can do to change that. I am just used to setting a very high standard, and I don't want people to feel judged in that. Oh, I have much to learn, but I don't have the energy to learn it right now. I just want to rest for a while.

I think it is hard when I continue to get emails from the ladies from last year asking me questions. A part of me wants to help, but a part of me wants to just say, "Well, should I be paying for the fact that my partner did hardly anything last year. So, they have to ask me because she doesn't know the answer? Why on EARTH did they pick her when she did hardly any work? Why did they reward her lazy behavior?" I know what the answer is: Politics. It is just that and nothing more. S had to chose because I couldn't go on with her, and he had to chose the elder's wife. That has to be it, but it sucks. So, I think that this contributes to my lethargy. I know as the conference come closer and closer that they will be asking me more and more questions, and they will finally see how much I contributed to the flow of things. That is why I was so exhausted after it though.

I am complaining. I guess I just lost a little confidence in the whole process, and I keep thinking that I will never have another opportunity like that again, and I blew it because I couldn't work with a drama queen. It isn't fair that I had to pay the price, but I look at where I am now, and I am so very grateful for where I have landed. So, it wasn't for naught. It really wasn't, but I don't like the constant reminder of my rejection for doing what is right.

So, that is my complaining on a Friday morning.

Ruminations on a Sunny Wednesday

I had a whole post yesterday, and there was some kind of system error, and it vanished into thin cyberspace.

I haven't been as good about keeping this blog up with my photoblog being a daily thing, but that is OK.

Yesterday, I made a decision that I would walk a little slower and purposely slow down everything. My life really isn't that stressful nowadays, but I want to be even more purposeful about saying no and not doing anything that I have to rush around for. I know that this sounds like an impossible task, but I am going to do it.

Actually, on a scale of 1 to 10 in comparison to most people that I know, I have a very slow life, but I want it even slower. I am especially going to not go to as many Bible studies next year. The way things have worked out this year, I am fine because the one I am in on Wenesday nights turns into a book discussion group about the time the Romans study is kicking into gear. So, that is cool, but I won't do Bird's Eye View of the Bible again. I love doing this and seeing Beth on a more consistent basis, and I knew this was my last year to participate in this thing I have heard so much about over the years. It is baby basic for me, but I still love it. I won't do it again. So, next year I will just be in a study and lead a study. That is it!

The dilemma that I have is that if I slow down too much, my kids get too bored. So, I may slow down my ministry time, but I want to spend more time with plugging my kids into things that will expand their horizons kid wise. I think M is especially feeling the need to be around more people, but he is a little bit afraid to take some risks in that area. So, I am praying how to encourage him in that way.

Well, I am getting too tired. It is 11:02, and I am done ruminating.

Back from the Dead or Bed

I had a glorious vacation, and you can check my photoblog for the pictures from that exciting experience with my mom and brother's family. I came back to being sick, sick, sick. So, I am just now eating solid foods again.

The good news is that any weight that I may have gained over the Christmas break/scrapbook stress/California overeating was all lost! (Well, probably not, it is no doubt water weight!). I have had a peaceful three days back home, but I am missing fellowship after a week in California and missing my three Bible studies since I came back from CA. So, I am looking forward to fellowship in the car with V, C, and C.

Here is my "Well" status!

Well-Educated Mind

I am back to full-leaded homeschooling with the boys. Rock cycle and catching up on the timelines and catching our Bible reading up to where we are in World History.

I am reading My Sister's Keeper. I really want to get back to the Well-Educated Mind autobiographies, but attacking The Gulag Archipelago by Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn is, quite honestly, INTIMIDATING. I want to proceed, but I need that push through attitude!

Well-Watered Soul

Loving the foray into the new Face to Face for Spiritual Growth book. May pick up Boa's Two Year Reading and Prayer Bible since I saw it used, and it might be just what I need since I already decided that I will take two years to read through the Bible instead of one.

I am still going through Romans, and hoping that K and N are ready to come along for the ride. They don't seem as disciplined to do their homework outside of the study. It is a long time away from my time with M, M, K, L, C, K, S. Those women were my "dream study." I really, really like K and N though. So, I want to stick with them and bring them along. K and I are so like-heared in so many other things though!

Love Beth's Bird's Eye View and Claudia's Ephesians. Ephesians will be ending just as we kick Romans into full gear. So, I am grateful for that!

Wellness in Heart

Overall, I am healing and growing and changing. I had a little fear about going to the Renada Ministries seminar knowing that Jean hasn't responded to my emails, and M may have poisoned her mind, but it would be more of a reflection on J character if she believes any of it than mine.

I am also realizing how blessed and surrounded in love I am with friends and family and church family. I just didn't have that "church" family blessing before, and I do now. It was a horrible situation for me, and I still believe that leaving NWH was the third best decision we have made in our lives (1) getting married 2) going to Malaysia (which also meant leaving NWH)).

My heart is well.

Wellness in Body

What can I say? I am on the mend from my sickness and have taken three days off of any kind of exercise in order to heal my body of this nasty flu/virus that has gotten me down.

My weight is "in range."

I am strong. I exercised four times out of the six days that I was in California. That is a great thing. I will be back at Timberhill AC by next Monday for the new launch of Group Power.

That is my update!

A Warm and Wonderful Day . . .

even though the weather is close to freezing! I stayed up until 2 a.m. this morning not realizing that I was walking with Cathi this morning! She knocked on the door at 8:15, and I was still in bed. She is a safe enough person that I felt fine about answering the door in my P.J.'s!

We had a lovely walk talking about family. I like her so much. I hope we can walk more in the future.

Then, I hit the homestretch on this scrapbook. The boys did school, and I helped them along as they did things independently. My goal was to finish before Sherry did my hair at 3 p.m. George was so sweet to call and offer to take the boys to music lessons so I could finish up.

Well, I made it to 1985, and I only had about 5 more pages left when I went to get my haircut.

Then, I finished up the last 5 in less than an hour. YEAH. I went out on date to McGrath's with George, and I even remembered to buy a birthday card for mom!

So, I am procrastinating about doing my wash and packing (as usual!). I don't know if I will Blog from CA or not, but I thought I would log in one last time here.

TTFN!

Place of Abundance and a Little Stress

"You let men ride over our heads;
We went through fire and water,
but you brought us to a place of abundance."

Psalm 66:12

This is the verse that stuck out to me in my Bible reading this morning. I had a "ride over my head and fire and water year last year, but I feel like you have brought G and I to a place of abundance in our new church. I look forward to going every Sunday! I come back refreshed and like I have had fresh water poured over my head over and over and over again from the worship, teaching, and fellowship. This is what church is supposed to be like, and I didn't know what I was missing out on all those years. YEAH!

The little stress is that I am trying to put this scrapbook together for my mom! But I am going to follow Nikki's quote from her photoblog:

We are never more fully alive, more completely ourselves, or more deeply engrossed in anything than when we are playing.--Charles Schaefer

I am having FUN and taking this on with lots of enthusiasm. Help, I am stuck in my mom's timewarp, and I can't get out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My heart be still

I am feeling very weird right now. I finally got to putting my mom's 80th Birthday scrapbook together. We had taken most of my mom's pictures with us up to Oregon after we moved her to Assisted-Living because her closet space is so very small. I asked George to bring up the boxes and there were FOUR huge ones. There is one from the Walter family from my mom's side. There is one from the Wardrop family on my dad's side. The other two are pictures from our growing up in one and pictures from the time after my dad's retirement.

Can you say BITTERSWEET?

I am looking at picture after picture of family and friends who have died, but I am also looking at my mom's past which was filled with joy . . . my parent's on their honeymoon . . . a "racey" anniversary card my dad gave to my mom . . . my parents on Mauii . . . camping trips and confirmations . . .graduations and grandchildren. . . .beauty pageants (Yes, my mom was "Miss Chicago Tall.") and babies.

Oh, my heart be still. I think it is going to a joyful experience to wade through these pictures and a challenging one emotionally.

Before the Battery Goes Out

I am trying to post daily.

What a day. I had such peace. Great workout in a small class (only five people!) Got my act together with laundry and homeschool and cleaning up the house. Connected greatly with the kids. Lisa came and we had such GOOD fellowship and tea. I am so glad I quit the cooking class. It is freeing up my life more. I needed a totally free day. So, tea and happy kids downstairs. Long talk with Jan on the phone about life and homeschool and books and tons of stuff. Pizza and news and PBS Friday night good stuff like NOW and Washington Week and Foreign Exchange and McLauglin Group while I talked to Kat on PM.

GIG! God is Good.

Each Day's Light

I had so many signs that you were there, right there.

The light streaming through the window as I read and prayed
The rainbow straight before me on the road
The circumcision of my heart as I studied Romans with K and N, a touch, a tear
The silver lining of the cloud above us as P and I walked around the block
The moon bright in the cold January sky when I decided to go the opposite way on our street
The dawning in my heart as Beth talked tonight

You are there . . .everywhere . . . whispering . . . loving me . . .loving the forum ladies . . . bringing all things to light.

"I felt like today was a day where nothing could go wrong." youngest dear son.

Verse from today's Bible reading

Sow for yourselves righteousness,
reap the fruit of unfailing love,
and break up your unplowed ground;
for it is time to seek the LORD,
until he comes and showers righteousness on you.
Hosea 18:12

I am seeking the Lord on what that unplowed ground may be.

Goals

So shoot me. I love to set goals. I love having a direction.

I have seven goals in 2007

WORSHIP - Moment by Moment practicing of His presence
WORDS - Words few and listen for purpose of prayer. Quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger.
W's - Immediate family and extended love and stay connected
WORK - Wake up to clean counters and sink.
WITNESS - Continue with N, Kid Club, and open to spontaneous relationships
WORD - Romans, Bird's Eye View, discipleship relationships
WEIGHT - Stay in 177-187 range by 6-10 hours of workout and logging my eating

Very simple.

6:30 - 9 a.m.

8:30 a.m. walk to Starbuck's with college friend, M. First Christian I met at OSU, 29 years ago.


Dinner out



Hoovey Dooveys with friends

The ball drops to 2007!

Toasting in the New Year with friends!

To bed at 1:45 a.m.

Ready to Party at 6:15 p.m.!

A totally silly, vampy pose, but I am in a silly mood tonight!

A Day in the life of . . . MOI! 9:00 - 5:30 p.m.

9:00 Go to Suburban Christian Church in the fog





12:30 George taught the 9:30 and 11:00 a.m. Sunday School classes on the State of World Missions. He is talking to his former discipler, Phil. (another reason we switched to this church!)





1:15 Traditional Stop at "Coffee Culture" for one Latte, one Steamer, and two fruit smoothies.






2:00 - 3:15 Elliptical Cardio at Timberhill. If you click on the picture, and scroll down a bit, you see an enlarge view of me in the window taking the picture.





3:30 p.m. A totally unflattering picture of me doing my Core workout on a stability ball.









4:00 - 5:30 Answer emails, reveiw news websites, post my end of the year answers on forum, and download pictures on to the computer to post this blog entry!



ACK! I have to go and take a shower for dinner and party! 5:30 - 9:00 a.m. tomorrow still to come!

Candlelight Dinner for Teala

Teala turned 48 today, and I had a small and intimate dinner party with four of her close friends. It was a lovely time. George was so sweet to cook all the food. We cleaned up yesterday, and it ended up being a really relaxed time of getting ready for it. The boys were gone for about five hours to watch the Beaver game at the H's. So, we worked on our respective projects (scrapbooking for me and paper for publication for George) and watched the Beaver game (I listened more than watched). It was a very nice time all the way around.

I cried for the Beavers and am very happy for them in every way.

I am still evaluating some things these days. I am still blown away at the kindness of so many people around me. I am so blessed.

Saddaam H. was hanged today. It was an strange thing to have a dinner party and go in to see George in the bedroom and have him tell me that.

Today had all the ingredients for a great day

1. Good night's sleep
2. Good quality time with George in the morning
3. Cleaned the whole house as a family - boys downstairs and George and I did the upstairs
4. Did four loads of laundry
5. Scrapbooked and had great friend-to-friend with Kim as we did it. She validates me! There is nothing like face-to-face time with a good friend. It beats the phone or email any day of the week.
6. Walk with George as the sun set over Glen Eden . . . ahhhhhhhhhh.
7. News
8. Being here resting
9. Chocolate!
   
   I love being on vacation.

Vacation!

Ahhhh.....I had my workout clothes all placed out on the floor at the end of my bed ready for a 5:30 a.m. blast off to the Group Power class. I woke up at 4:45 a.m. and thought I would sleep a bit longer.

I reawakened at 5:38 a.m., and it was too late.

So, I thought, "I can go to the 9:20 a.m. class!" Well, I am glad I checked the schedule this morning because they changed it, and there isn't another class until 7:30 tonight.

So, the sun is shining, and George and I are going for a walk. Plan B always has a silver lining.

Still feeling somewhat squishy about things that happened last week. Don't know what I am going to do about it, but I am going to just take it one day at a time. I am still sort of sad about all the fast changes. George also reminded me of something that I had forgotten I had said that has made me wonder whether I should make a change. I am just listening and waiting.

Today, George will do Dial-A-Book and take the boys to music lessons so that I can work on my scrapbooks. He will also go to the bank and deposit all the Christmas checks. We were so very blessed this year.

First is the walk though. We have a big stretch of sunshine this morning, and I want to seize it before the next wave of rain comes in!

Christmas Day . . . Santa Got SMASHED!

I really love my dh's family! I was feeling a bit tired and still a bit sick, but the five hours we spent with his family just picked me up and encouraged me like no other.



Yummy things to eat and fun people to greet!

Great kids to share in the fun.

Making ice cream in the ball and playing catch with it!

Aunt Dot wins a 4 lb Chocolate Santa that we divide up between us by smashing Santa!

What a great time! I really loved the "pick me up"!

Merry Christmas!

Well, Paul hardly slept at all, and he really wanted to get up. I heard him going up and down the stairs at about 4 a.m.!

After we were all done opening gifts, he said that the whole Christmas was perfect except for not being able to have the Cowden Christmas Party.

We had a great low-key season, and I never "dipped" because of the holiday. I did dip because of the TDS thing and M asking me about the future with M. That made me sad to have to dredge all of that stuff up again in my heart, but Christmas was so wonderful. I had a great time in every way.

Paul was a little disappointed when he got another version of Roller Coaster Tycoon, but I assured him that it was the latest and best model. Then he felt bad for being disappointed and kept looking at me to make sure I was OK. Poor guy. I'm OK! I think he is fine now. He installed it and thought it looked really neat.

George got a book from one of the boys in the boys' group called Better Dads, Stronger Sons by Rick Johnson. This list called "Mistakes All Dads Make" made me realize what a great dad George is to his sons!

1. Emphasize weaknesses, not strengths


2. Avoiding physical affection


3. Giving too little time


4. Pushing for performance


5. Forgetting to have fun


6. Fearing failure


7. Abusing your power


8. Neglecting your need for friendships


9. Being inconsistent


10. Being complacent and passive

George just came back and read me the final exhortation in the whole book. He thought it was a good one:

"In closing this book, let me summarize my counsel about raising your son to nobility with one sentence: remember to tell your boy you love him and are proud of him, to pray for him, to spend time with him, and to love his mother. That's the best advice."

And their dad has done all these things and more!

Still, Still, Still

Before I had children, I always dreamed of being able to sing my kids to sleep on Christmas Eve singing the song "Still, Still, Still."

When the kids were toddlers, they didn't like it when I sang to them. So, I let that dream die. It was OK.

But earlier this month, while we were listening to a Mannheim Steamroller CD with this song (a beautiful rendition BTW), Paul said, "What are the words to that song?" I started singing a bit and then I jokingly told him that I have tried to sing that song to them on several Christmas Eves, but I was booed. He said, "Mom, I really don't remember doing that." I said, "Well you were young."

This evening, Paul and Michael both asked me if I would sing the song to them after Dad read Bartholomew's Passage. I was shocked. They said, "No, mom, really."

While George read, I went downstairs and played the melody line on the piano. Then, George said, "They are ready for you." I decided I wasn't going to be flustered, and I wasn't going to worry how it sounded. I would just sing with confidence and joy. I did just that.

I started on perfect pitch. The moment was so surreal and so beautiful. I remember thinking as I sang that I wanted to cry because it was so beautiful, but I also thought that I would not do that, and I didn't. I wanted it to be seamless.

I sang in the dark the song I have wanted to sing to them for the last fifteen years. At the end, they clapped, and Paul said, "That was really good, Mom. You did a really good job. It was like a lullaby. It made me start to fall asleep. I am just going to do that right now." Michael softly said, "Good job."

My dream of singing a sweet song in the dark to my boys has been realized, and I just had a lovely memory moment.

The words:

Still, still, still
Can you hear the falling snow?
While all is still the world is sleeping
Holy Star its vigil keeping.
Still, still, still,
Can you hear the falling snow?

Sleep, sleep, sleep, 'tis the eve of our Savior's birth
The night is peaceful all around you,
Close your eyes, let sleep surround you
Sleep, sleep, sleep 'tis the eve of our Savior's birth.

Dream, dream, dream of the joyous day to come.
While guardian angels without number
Watch you as you sweetly slumber.
Dream, dream, dream of the joyous day to come.

Thank you, Lord for this day. Thank you Lord for my children, and the man who stood in the shadow of the doorway and cheered me on with his mere presence as I sang.

'Tis a gift to be a part of this family. I got my present for Christmas already.

Christmas Eve Freewrite

I want to sing and dance and say, "I am feeling so much better!" I actually went to the club this afternoon and had a good cardio workout, and I didn't terrible afterward! That hasn't happened for about two weeks now. So, YIPPEE!

Our first Christmas at Suburban Christian was all it was meant to be and more. I loved it. We had a couple behind us who was honored because today is their 60th wedding anniversary! I love how Pastor Steve acknowledges these milestones of the congregation.

He also introduced us because we (really George) will be leading a Sunday School class on "The State of the World" in missions. They are so eager and up for everything there. I love how Steve also makes everyone feel so welcome.

We came back and I had some more St. Lucia Day Cinnamon Rolls while I gave Becky her "virtual gift" on TDS. I loved it, and I think she did too. She is a good one to "shop" for!

Then, I hit that club, and it was PACKED. I wasn't sure if it would be dead because it is Christmas Eve or would be deserted. I think everyone is getting their last workout in because of the limited hours on Tuesday and NO HOURS on Monday for Christmas.

I finished Shepherd's Abiding and started watching I Remember Mama with Irene Dunn. I love the film about a Scandinavian family!

I came home and didn't feel lousy. That is so great, and I called and talked to Teala, but Debbie and my mama didn't answer.

The kids had John over all afternoon until a few minutes ago when Jim picked him up and said, "Our church . . ." It was weird to have him talk about it that way since it used to be our church too. This is the only time I have felt weird about leaving Northwest Hills. I will miss the Christmas Eve service, but I am also excited to go watch.

It's a Wonderful Life

with my great family while the RED AND GREEN meal cooks on the stove.

I love my life, even though it had some bumps this week. :)

Santa Lucia Day 11 Days Late!

It was a fun morning!

Review of Pursuit of Happyness

It was a sweet story. I don't think it is any Academy Award winner, but it is poignant. The only think that I would say is that happiness is not in having money, and Chris Gardner is the first to say that in his interviews. So, the movie may have a little bit too much emphasis on the fact that all those stock brokers out on the sidewalk were happy because they were making 80,000 a month (that is the amount the man in the red car was making when Chris Gardner asked him). With all that said, money does provide a roof over our heads and food in our stomach. So, we do need it to survive.

Chris Gardner has said in his interviews that "home" and "happiness" are in the relationships that we have with one another and the time we spend in investment. This was definitely modeled by the character in the movie, but the dialogue made it sound like money was the be all end all. Chris Gardner would not agree. He said in an interview on Oprah something to the effect that he knows people with all the money in the world that don't spend any time with their children, and that is a tragedy. So, he is talking about being "spiritually" poor there even with a lot of money.

Overall, I really did like it though. It was a good movie to count your blessings during the holidays.

I am skipping my Group Power class again. I didn't feel well when I got up this morning again. I am going for a walk with Michelle at 9 a.m., and I didn't want to over do it with weigh lifting and walking. I am going to ease back into everything very slowly. I have been sick off and on for almost ten days now. Hopefully, I will be better by Christmas.

Laughing Out Loud

Just had to add that I did the whole post below not realizing that I was now going to see the movie:


The PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS.

Tee Hee!

I am so darn happy.

I have about five minutes before I am out the door to the movie, but I wanted to write a little freewrite. I looked in the mirror a few minutes ago, and I like what I see! I have kept the weight I lost this summer for three months now. That was about ten percent of my body weight. So, I like how I feel in my body. I like how I feel in my clothes. I like how I have been able to stay in shape all through the busy fall.

On top of that, I like who I am around and where I am going. No more crazy, psycho, drama queen ladies in my life anymore, and I am happy that I am being VERY selective about who I allow in my life now. So, I not only like how I look right now, I like who I am hanging with.

I like my kids. They are not big jocks. They aren't really popular. They are just nice PEOPLE. Just today we were all laughing at The Complete Adventures of Curious George, and we were just having a fun time.

I like my husband. He makes me so darn happy. He likes to go to movies and will go with my girlfriends and me. He likes similar books. He likes to talk deep at a moments notice. He likes to invest in people and not things. That is a huge value.

I like my extended family and in-laws. There is peace on ever side, and we know how to make peace if anything happens because all those people on both sides of the family are committed to peace.

I like my church. Another group of people who are commited to peace. I like this new family.

Well, I am out of time and off to spend a lovely evening with friends and my sweet, adorable, tall, handsome and sexy husband.

I am so hilariously happy.

The end.

Bummer. I did a whole post and lost the thing. I am at 14 posts this month! So, that means I have broken my previous record of most posts in one month! I have more posts this year than any other year.

Today
Slept In
Read Bible
Studied Ephesians
Prayed
Walked with Cathi and Jess (She lives RIGHT on the edge of Peavy Arboreteum trails!)
Talked with Cathi and Jess
Bought Steamer, scones, and cinnamon rolls (for St. Lucia Day) at Jamocha Jo's
Entered more books in my library
Found out my Thumbelina and Little Mermaid books are RARE and worth bucks!
Visited TrapdoorSociety.

Now, I am off to The Pursuit of Happyness with Teala, Shelley, and George.

Bye Bye for Now!

I plan to cry. :)

Day is Done . . .Almost Gone the Sun

The Runyons, Kinkades, Alexander Boys, and our family all got together for the annual gingerbread party.

It worked out really great. It was a little chaotic at first, but we all settled down and got to work. My kids were pretty independent once we got he house together.

What a fun and relaxed week I am having!

Now, the Alexander boys are staying until Boy's Group, and I am going to have some time to rest and think about dinner later. :)

Today is Gingerbread House Day

Yes, we will make another one of these lovely creations. We have done this since before we went to Malaysia, although the picture of the first one we did was lost forever when someone stole my camera. (Big sigh). I believe that was in 1996, right before we went away to Malaysia!

I don't think we did them in Malaysia though. So, we have done them since 1999! Wow! I will have to find a photo archives of all our attempts at making the perfect house.

We have done it with the K's for the last three years, and that has been lovely. I have invited the Alexander boys, and Dee has invited the Sarah and Emma. So, it should be fun, fun, fun.

I am on the verge of my 100th post after two years of doing this blog. It is a time for celebration (Although I had the other blog that mysteriously disappeared, and I probably had about 50 posts on that one alone)!

I will post pictures of our Gingerbread Creations in a little bit.

Still want to celebrate Santa Lucia Day, but I think it will be on Saturday. I am hoping that George will make some yummy cinnamon rolls on Friday night!

TTFN!

P.S. Don't you love my nifty "Books that I have Read" tab on the side? Thank you Ampersand for teaching me how to do this and finding that nifty site that I told you about yesterday. I spent most of the day entering books that I have read. Many were from lists I have made over the years, but some were just from memory when they popped into my head. I am sure there are many more that I have read, but I entered more than 500 yesterday. My head hurts, and I am staying away from that website today.

Oh, how really FUN!

I just found a great new website where I can catalog all the books that I have read. I have always wanted to do this, but it would be so laborious! This makes it really easy! You can type in the name of the ISBN, and the information and the picture of the book appear!

It is free for the first 200, but it is only $25 for LIFE. I am there. What a great new tool! Now, if I could only figure out how to do widgets on the sidebar and display my library books!



www.librarything.com

Help anyone?

Looks like it is YUL!

I am great with that. I liked them both. I liked Yul from the beginning, but I also liked Ozzy. So, I am glad for Yul but sad for Ozzy!

Notes on Survivor Jury

Nate - Called Yul The Godfather, called Ozzy The Warrior. Good question. I want Ozzy. Nate is asking why Becky deserves a million dollar over them. Boy, Becky is going to get fried. Poor thing. She is a smart cookie. She really is.

Jenny - What is more important; the physical or the strategic element? Yul thinks strategy is more important. Yul could do it.

Parvati - Becky, convince me that you want to win this. She wanted to win in a way that she is proud.

Jenny - Is that her name? She thought they were flawless. Yul in strategy. Ozzy in challenges. Yul wanted minorities on TV. See Asian American men as they truly are. Good point. Minorities represented on TV. Ozzy wants to change the stereotype of what a Mexican. He thinks he can become a positive role model. WOW! It is going to be so close.

Adam - Thinks they aer painfully boring. Talk trash about the other two. Not about you. Yul didn't work as hard as he could. Becky riding on coat tails. You should be able to make a fire after 39 days.

Candice - Think that they made it after the mutiny is cool. Yul you say what people want to hear. Say Yes or No. You have been shamelessly working this jury. YES.

Brad - Kudos to all of you. Ozzy, I had a fifteen second conversation. Most challenging experience in your life. The man can't be around and take responsibility. Father never been around and been there for you. The person that created you doesn't want you around or whatever. Oh, I want Ozzy. He is so cute, but it will probably be Yul. Oh well.

Sondra - What have you discovered about yourself? Ozzy: Pure love. There is nothing here but mind, soul, body. Learning to love. Loving and cherishing every single moment. Becky: Let time go. Yul: New found self-confidence about myself. I had alot of fears and anxieties. She likes them all. Loves them all. Oh, it is going to be a hard one.

Jonathan - He says congratulations. Yul is very polite but political. Your future constituents. How can you telling half truths and half lies are right about integrity. Yul says that Survivor is a game. I would never do this in real life. Was very true to the original people. Ozzy you are arrogant. You act as if you are a prince. I am a little bit uncomfortable about your "entitlement." Ozzy: I would go back to school. I would complete higher education without money I would owe to someone else. Becky didn't even get asked. Poor Becky. I don't know if she will get a single vote.

That is the notes for the JURY!

Another Sick Day

I am sick today. Yesterday, I almost fell asleep during White Christmas at the Pix Theatre. It was such a delightful film, but I could tell that I was still sick.

I tried to watch Captain's Courageous with George, but I kept falling asleep. So, I slept from 8:20 - 11:40 last night, and I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep until 4 a.m. So, I used the time to read Hinds' Feet on High Places. How delightful! I haven't read this since I was in college!

Skipped church, and George said that our new pastor said he hopes I feel better. Also, Kim, the children's ministry director, said she was praying. What a great, great church to even care that I was sick! I was gone for a whole summer once because of major surgery, and the only ones who even noticed were the people in my Bible study! I am simply amazed at how caring this church really is. Thank you JESUS for giving me a new, caring church family.

So, while my sweet family was at church, my sweet friend, Teala, called, and we talked for three hours! She needed someone to process things with. What a dear friend of almost 30 years!

Debbie also emailed to say that she thinks she will engaged by the New Year! WOOOHOOO!

Off to have Jambalya with sausage and chicken!

YUMMY and I am a spoiled person when it comes to my sweet husband serving me

I'm Dreamin' of a . . .

I had the nicest time at the Pix theatre with Shelley watching a Christmas Classic! For a can of food, I was treated to this on the big screen. I am sold on big screen viewing of old movies.

What a great way to spend a Saturday afternoon!

:)

UNO by Candlelight

Last night, the power went out at 7 p.m. We had quite a bad windstorm brewing, and I knew that Alsea had lost power earlier in the day.

We had all our Christmas candles throughout the living room. So, I lit just about all of them (19 in all), and the living room/kitchen/dining room was stunningly beautiful. Such a peace set over our family as we talked to candlelight. We figured it wouldn't be long before the lights came back on.

We didn't know how long we would be without power. So, we made the best of it.

Paul and George were going to sit down to a game of UNO thinking that Michael and I wouldn't be interested. Well, they were wrong. To their utter shock, I sat down with them and played UNO to candlight! We had so much fun! The only difficult thing was the the blue and green cards are very hard to distinguish by candlelight, and one of the candles at the dining room table melted all over my fancy Christmas tablecloth. Other than that, it was a blast. Paul won 2. George won 1, and I won 1, but they gave me the last game because we all got tired of playing it in the mild.

After that, we sat in the living room with the fire blazing and candes burning and talked about our highs and lows for the year. Paul cried, and we hugged. He still remembered a painful time we had together at the beginning of the year. I had forgotten all about it, but it was good to talk it through again. I will say that since we had that hard time, Paul has been a changed person. He is much more sensitive, and we are much closer. (The painful time was when I reacted TOO strongly to a hurtful thing he said to me.).

Then, we talked about the funniest things that happened in 2006, and we were rolling on the floor laughing. Michael can't always articulate the highs and lows, but he can go on and on about the funny things.

The lights returned at 10:45, and it was too soon for me. I willingly missed my Survivor show for a blessed time with my lovely family of four. It made me want to continue to grab every moment we have together. These times are so short and precious.

Sick Day

Today was supposed to be my last "busy" day before Christmas. It was homeschool, Dial a Book, Good News Christmas Club, and Bible study. Everything was put off because I overslept and felt achy all day. So, it was DAD on DAB today. He took the boys, and I had a couple of hours of total quiet. I have been sort of wasting the day, but that's OK.

I don't know why, but I was just musing over someone's response to me when I told them something deep about how I felt about something. The whole time she just kept denying my feelings. This is someone who is supposed to be getting a degree in helping people. I just don't get it. Thankfully, she is not one of my close friends but one of the people who is in the "vortex." I am so glad to be with people who don't deny who I am made to be anymore. I am so thankful to be in a healthier environment. It is so great.

So, that is all I have to say about that. :)

Rules for Love and Marriage

I am reading Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom in the chapter on marriage Morrie says, "There are a few rules I know to be true about love and marriage:

If you don't respect the other person,

you're gonna have a lot of trouble.

If you don't know how to compromise,

you're gonna have a lot of trouble.

If you can't talk openly about what goes on between you,

you're gonna have a lot of trouble.

If you don't have a common set of values in life,

you're gonna have a lot of trouble.

I have two reactions to these quotes

1) Praise God that George and I have all four of these things going for us! I respect the socks off of him. Such a man of integrity and compassion. He communicates respect for me in a million ways. We can always come to compromise and consensus. We can talk about anything, and we have never had times of "silence." Helps to both be extroverted feelers! Last but not least, we had the same life goals and values about God, money, family, etc before we even met each other. Thankful this morning.

2) All four of these were not present in my most recent "ministry marriage." So, why didn't I realize there was going to be a hunk of trouble?

Food for thought.