I started this freewrite on Monday. It is now Thursday. I love to freewrite, and I see it as such an important part of my "Rule of Life" in that I can process in a "stream of consciousness" way that involves writing and creativity for me. I realize I have been freewriting now for almost 20 years. I know it started when I met my friend, Julie Bogart (Creator and Owner of Bravewriter), and I know I met her in a Sonlight Forum in 1998 or so. Somewhere along the line, she introduced freewriting. It was definitely before 9/11, and that was 2001.
I rested all day yesterday because Sunday through Tuesday ended up being pretty busy. I had some follow-up to the 2nd Half Collaborative that I am helping with as a small group facilitator. This week, they are learning about the Cycle of Grace, and I think I have shared about it here. If not, here is a handout that I developed for my teaching on the subject. It is funny that THIS DAY, three years ago, I taught on it for the very first time. It is interesting to note, that the youngest member of the group I taught it to gave the most push back about it. I just don't think he got it, but he probably will in the future, and he will maybe be in the 2nd Half Collaborative when he is in his 40s. :)
So, I also had to send out a Doodle poll to set up a meeting time on the fourth week of the next 10 months for the 2nd Half Collaborative. I was so afraid to send it out! George finally said, "Do you want me to just press the button for you?" It was ridiculous. I wasn't sure if it would really work for the three different time zones we are working from. I was worried that I made the times too early for the West Coast people, yadda yadda yadda. (I took a walk at the labyrinth releasing the fear, and I pushed the button by myself, by the way.)
I also fit in some time on Tuesday after my prayer periods in the am and before my interview with an Ignatian Spiritual Director, to go and see Cammie B. face to face. I love my regular spiritual director, but every three months, she supervises me rather than does a spiritual direction session. I needed to process, so I emailed Cammie! She is 10 minutes from my house, a Type Two on the Enneagram (like me), used to be a supervisor and has been doing this for 14 years, and her husband is a brilliant ecologist who used to work with George's old boss and major professor for his Ph.D.
It was a delightful time. Cammie and I talked about boundaries. I was intimidated by someone recently. It is someone who bullied me 11 years ago, and I just took it. I had forgiven and moved on and had no contact until they popped up in my life unexpectedly! All the old fears came rushing back in! I am SO MUCH BETTER at setting boundaries than I was then, but I still was scared to be around that person. So Cammie helped me work through that. It was so great. She didn't want the session to end. I am pretty sensitive to wanting to honor her time. So I stopped at the hour mark, but she said, "Let's keep going." Such a gift, and she doesn't even want to charge me. She said what would bless her is if I supervised some of her sessions because she has no one to supervise her. She is a gem. I just love her!
Another really life-giving thing that happened this week sort of had two parts. We went to the lake on Sunday, and it was a HUGE group of people. Many of the people are ones I have a deep relationship with, but because of the nature of the 4th of July day, there was nothing but short "chit-chat" conversations. I was able to lay down my "Compulsion to Connect" (A Type Two negative thing, connection is a strength, but compulsion to connect is an ego fixation) and get in my kayak and enjoy the flight of an osprey against a clear blue sky. It was so exciting to see him dive for fish and catch one! It was also great to watch my husband catch a fish himself. But I told George, when he got back from fishing, that I was exhausted with just chit-chat with people. So we left a bit earlier than most. I fell asleep by 8 pm! The fireworks did not even wake me up.
Then on Tuesday, we had some of those same people from the 4th over because of friends visiting from North Africa. We had been in a group back in 2017-2018, and it was a reunion of hearts. Deeper sharing and heart to heart time and tacos and cherry pie. It was so life-giving. (This is the same group I taught the Cycle of Grace to three years ago.)
So that is why I have been busy. Now, I am leading a Silent Prayer time for the FIRST TIME in two hours. Then A is visiting from AZ and bringing her beau, and we are going out to lunch. Then we are going to pick up E and S from the airport, and we are all going out to dinner. Then A and E are spending two nights here, and we are hiking at the Oregon Coast tomorrow. E stays another three nights and leaves next Tuesday. BIG WEEKEND COMING. It will be very relational.
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