Well-Watered Soul
Your presence astounds me this early morning. I got up sensing that I would not have a Theophostic appointment this morning, and there was an email sent at 11:24 pm last night asking for postponement due to sickness. So, I can luxuriate with You and my family until my 2:30 appointment. At which time, I can luxuriate with someone that has been through Theophostic and already has a memory that they want to explore and is a Theophostic counselor herself. So, it should be a delight. :)
I am happy because this is our first day as a family free of the confines of college studies. Michael is reading The Hunger Games, Paul will probably be talking, talking, talking because he is excited to have school done with, and George just might need to stay home and work due to the snow!
Back to Your presence. I was a little down yesterday. It was triggered by Michael spilling my freshly made chai tea in an effort to move my tea cozy. It is so true that there is "no use crying over spilled milk," but it made me very sad. It wasn't the spilled milk but something I had been mulling over and struggling with. The pieces had been falling together over the last five days as an old friend (who I haven't talked to for some time) called me about her gift of discernment. Another friend had told her to call me to ask questions about this gift. This old friend and I have SO MUCH in common. I think that people with that gift should get together because then we wouldn't think we were crazy! LOL!
All that to say is that she confirmed something from a discernment from years ago (and one of the real and deeper reasons why we had to make drastic changes six years ago), and she got me thinking about a more recent discernment. It confirmed that the "weight" that I had been experiencing and stuffing for five days was real. While it came up with my phone conversation on Tuesday, I stuffed it only to have it resurface with the spilled milk.
My first action was to pray through my "Morning Affirmations" Scripture. (And felt convicted that I needed to apologize to Michael for scolding him when it was an accident. I did that immediately. Such a forgiving guy with such a big heart.) Then, I decided to record it so that I could play the Scripture on my iPod anytime, anywhere. The "Protection in Spiritual Warfare" section is always so invaluable to me, and Carol C. and Patty have always exhorted me to "armor up" daily because of the nature of our work. I am lazy sometimes in this area, and I usually pay for it.
The "cloud" of discernment of evil still remained. SO, I texted Kim and Teala. They both called. Kim, is my discernment twin, and she confirmed for me many things about my experience recently. She also said, "If it is still bothering you five days later, Carol. It is probably pretty important." We prayed and I was able to check up on her spirit with Ted being gone and pray for her as well. Love my soul-mate!
Then, Teala called with much needed wisdom (I really think this may be a gift of hers) about acting on a nudge from the Lord and not delaying. She related an experience where she did not act upon a nudge to back away from a relationship (in love), and she paid for it by being attacked by that unhealthy person for no reason other than that person's own pain. (Thus explaining why she wanted to go out for tea. She didn't say why (because she is an introvert), and I didn't follow up on it. I knew something was wrong. Should have followed up more.)
So, I think I know what to do. I have become a target of another person's pain, and I think I need to just slowly back away (and it may be temporarily until that person heals more). I think that person's spiritual attackers know my number and are doing everything they can to discourage me, but I will pray from a distance and let the LORD strategize and fight for me.
The reservations about doing this because of the cost that it would cause me in other areas were quickly settled when I processed out loud with Teala too.
SO, I come this morning firm in my resolution of a course of action that will probably be more beneficial for all.
Thank You God for bringing back peace. No use crying over that spilled milk because it led me to profound peace this morning. :)
"What makes the desert beautiful is that somewhere it hides a well" (The Little Prince by de Saint-Exupéry). One woman's journey to wellness through a well-adjusted heart, well-watered soul, well-educated mind, and well-tuned body. "Love the Lord your God with all your HEART, and with all your SOUL, and with all your MIND, and with all your STRENGTH" (Mark 12:30-31).
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