How to Pray Study Guide Questions: Chapters 7-8

Week 4 Asking (pt. 2) and Yield (pt. 1)

Read:

Chapter 7: Unanswered Prayer

Chapter 8: Contemplation

Key verse: “Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven” – Matthew 6:10

Summary points

· The Bible is honest about unanswered prayer – we are part of a faith that is all about wrestling

· God’s world, God’s war, God’s will.

· God’s silence is not the same as his absence.

· Contemplative prayer is silent enjoyment of God’s loving presence.

· The contemplation journey has 3 stages:

o Meditation: “Me and God”

o Contemplation: “God and me”

o Communion: “only God”

Questions

Q. Have you ever felt God’s silence/absence in seasons of your life and faith? How did you respond? How has the reality of unanswered prayer affected your relationship with God?

The first thing that comes to mind is my time surrounding my move to Eugene. I was SO overwhelmed with my career (working 60-80 hour weeks) in a new city, living alone. Once I moved in with Gwen, things turned radically around. I think I realized how much we need community for growth. (“There is a strong temptation toward self-isolation when our souls are overwhelmed” [p. 117].) He led me to not speak at the Women’s Conference and to go to the Proclaim Conference (now Mission Connection) and re-meeting with George and what God had told me before that, connecting miraculously with Steve, going to Thailand. I really feel I left Corvallis because of fear and giving up on the vision he had given me. I was also running away from my two best guy friends getting married. “God’s greatest refusals were sometimes the true answers to our truest prayer” (PT Forsyth). I see that he wanted to give me the BEST (and that was a new vision and George as my husband) and “exceeding abundantly beyond what I could ever ask or imagine” (Eph 3:20). The dark night I experienced made me also get some help and career counseling from Shari’s mom who helped me find out what was a better fit for me career-wise. Financial aid counseling was NOT it!

I think unanswered prayer has taught me the beauty of “waiting” (Kavah in Hebrew) and persevering in prayer. I pray toward the peace of God. It has bound me closer to him rather than made me angry at him or doubt his kindness. He knows what is best for me. “His trains are always on time and never miss their connections” (Ginny Bowen).

Q. How do you think we can get better, as communities, at dealing with the realities and challenges of unanswered prayer?

Let people feel their feelings and encourage honesty with God. To listen and not judge like Job’s friends.

Q. How can we encourage one another in “faithfulness” as well as “faith”?

I am not sure I know how to answer this one. I can encourage others by example. I can encourage others by asking them to join me in my adventures in prayer. I can ask and listen when people tell me how they are experiencing God in their daily life.

Q: What is your initial reaction to the practice of contemplation? Does it excite you, scare you, or bore you?

EXCITE! It is my favorite part of prayer. I love to commune with God. Thus, this was my favorite chapter.

Q. How does this quote from Mother Teresa challenge our culture’s attitude to social justice or practical action? “It’s not how much we do but how much love we put into the actions that we do.”

This is what I have talked with one of my directees, just this morning. It is about overflow. It is about operating out of that centered place with God, who is love. Then he oozes out into our actions.

Q. It can be difficult to make time to pause and contemplate God. What rhythms could you put in place to grow this type of prayer in your life?

I take the time to contemplate in silence and centering prayer every day. I became more intentional when I was to "pick a practice" for my spiritual direction training in 2018. I remember reading a book where he said he did it twice a day for twenty minutes, and I said, "No way!" But I thought I would be intentional. I had practiced it when I first went to the Trappist Monastery in 2014 maybe, but it was not a regular practice of mine.

I was inspired to pursue longer periods of it over the past two years since reading The Cloud of Unknowing and The Interior Castle. I began practicing it with others two-three times a week for 20 minutes (with 30-40 people by Zoom at 8:30 am on Sundays and 12:30 pm on Thursdays). I begin and end my Lectio Divina time with contemplation. The last step in Lectio Divina – “Silencio” is centering prayer contemplation and ‘apophatic” (prayer without words). I find it helpful to contemplate in the midst of chaos now too.

Do It

Pete says, “Even when we don’t understand, we can still trust”. Take time to stop, pause, and recommit to trusting God in your life. You might like to play some worship music and spend time sitting and reflecting.